I would happily see this movie | Script Revolution

I would happily see this movie

What I Loved: 

"Amaranthine" is the type of movie I'd love to see on the big screen! It's a well-crafted sci-fi thriller with a female protagonist who happens to be gay.

I loved so many things about this:

The technology at the center of this sci-fi story is so, so cool! It will make a wonderful visual on screen and provides a great catalyst for the plot. I also loved the role surveillance functions of technologies plays into this story, rendering it quite relevant in today's world.

Furthermore, Meg Turner pays attention to transitions between scenes which makes for a great read and gives the script a very cohesive feel. She also has a gift for descriptions – many times I would highlight a phrase or sentence and write "love this!" in the PDF note.

"Amaranthine" is also peppered with great character moments ("No needles.") and scenes that had me at the edge of my proverbial seat as I read them. I especially enjoyed the final beat since it made it a very satisfying read.

Fingers crossed for a producer who sees the potential of this script!

What I'd Love To See: 

I would have loved to experience the world more – there are fascinating details at the beginning that that are never referred to again, for example the "airtight dome above the man-made atmosphere". Since it's called out, I expected it to become important later. As is, it's amazing world-building that unfortunately doesn't lead anywhere yet and set up some false expectations in my mind.
Also, there are self-driving cars! Which we only learn 50+ pages in (unless I missed something). At the same time, digital wrist watches and smart phones as well as first aid kits have seemingly remained the same, which struck me as odd and distracted me from the story.

I'd have loved for the writer to either decide whether or not to call out the camera and shots, or to stick with evoking the sense of it throughout. As is, the late arrival of POV shots struck me as rather gimmicky and disrupted my immersion in the story.

The main thing I'd have loved to see is less confusion in certain moments - on my part, that is. I came across some small inconsistencies, for instance Amaranthine HQ is equated to a 911 dispatch office but later in the script characters have to call 911 separately from Amaranthine, which made me go, "Huh?"
I was also confused as to why what happens to the witnesses doesn't cause more buzz. Like, where is the media in all this?


The big thing for me, however, was Lane's resurrection. I read the script twice and I can't quite follow the narrative logic.

Detective Fischer could have done with being more fleshed out, in my opinion. I never connected with her character so her arc left me unmoved.



I get very detailed when I read scripts while planning to give feedback on it, so I have further comments. However, they would be much too vague to be helpful in this format (instances of very exposition-y or obviously 'written' dialogue; pacing concerns, instances of telling rather than showing, fatphobic overtones that made me a little uncomfortable)... though I'm happy to go into detail if requested :)

Yet, all these things considered, I'd still greatly enjoy this film if it were shot as is!