Fiona Faith Ross

FADE IN.

So, CJ asks...

• Where your passion lies.
• Your journey so far.
• Where you want to go.
• What makes you special?
• What you’re working on.

It's a kick up the ***. Five times. Got me thinking.

Writing a bio is crap, mostly, anyway. I don't think writers should write their own bios. There are PR people to do that, but since this is my own work, I'll try to squash the inner doubt (why am I even doing this?) and get a firmer grip on my sanity.

'It's not me, it's you.' I remember the tender age I moved up to Middle School. Even then I suspected the world had gone mad. I knew it wasn't me. Many years later I see I was right. The proof is everywhere we look, but who wants to keep company with one warped soul deflating the shiny unicorns and rainbows floating on the edge of your vision? Isn't she the swivel-eyed nut job? That's right. Y'all got better things to do than listen to the ramblings of one idiot. I'm not JOKER. I couldn't even compete, so I write about my stuff. I work all my passion and fury for the world out on the page, which makes me

 writer.

Y'all got shows to run, movies to make, coffee deprivation... but... I might have THE script. THE gem. I might have what y'all are looking for.

She's THE ONE!!!

Did I stoke the FOMO, mofo?

Gotcha!

Ha ha.

My journey so far? I've written stuff since I can remember, like every other writer. I made a commitment to write fiction seriously in 2005. I had some flybys with literary agents and a handful of unpublished novels.

In 2018, I launched FLAT SQUIRREL - not literally. I mean, I didn't throw the little fella off the top branch to see if he could fly. I discovered just how hard it is to get a manuscript into respectable print form. I'm rubbish at promoting, which is why you've never heard of him, but he's not a quitter, so his screenplay has landed a couple of minor placements.

My second feature script WERETEEN won the Florida Comedy Film Festival 2018.

You can read the scripts here on Script Revolution. There are a few shorts, but not as much output in 2019.

So... am I chilled, smoking up like Krakatoa? Nope. For the last year, I've been taking intensive screenwriting courses, working on my craft. I've knocked out the shorts to practice new skills. I've changed my process. All of it. Working, re-working, wiping and re-working again. I get a buzz out of putting it on the page, but that's not so easy to do.

What makes me special? No idea. That's for y'all to say - you're the experts. Once in a blue moon I make people laugh, like the crew over at Film Festival Circuit. You'll find them on Film Freeway and their site. They like my stuff, including ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM, which I'll admit, is whacky nonsense. Why did I write it? Because I can. Because our culture has a great tradition of slapstick humour which deserves to be honoured.  And every time I make the FFC guys laugh, it just encourages me. Don't say you weren't warned.

On the other hand, my jokes can empty a room. I don't have a warped sense of humour, trust me, but... am I in the minority? Are they looking for nerds like me to fill the backs of ambulances? People don't 'always' get me, but as I said, I'm addicted to it, and my goal is to be a working screenwriter, singly or part of a team. I love the creative spark of teamwork. It's all I want to do. Movies are my life.

I'm working on a supernatural thriller (love those) and a clutch of crazy comedy shorts. TURF WARS got lovely feedback from two producers, and is strong enough to be worked up to a feature. Hey-ho, time to open Final Draft before mine becomes a legacy version. But then, I've changed my process; I'm not ready to go to execution yet. Everything needs a rewrite.

SFX: Record scratch.

Hmm...

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and hoping for better results.

Maybe it is me, after all.

SFX: Madwoman cackles and shrieks (with echo).

FADE OUT.

See my work here. Check out my bio (boring, gotta change it) on IMDB (Pro). Pretty posters, though. 

P.S. All credit to CJW for writing that inspirational blog post on 6 October, and virtual hugs going his way, since we haven't met in person.