Who's Your Daddy? or "Sorted" by Phil Mitchell | Script Revolution

Who's Your Daddy? or "Sorted"



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Three illegitimate Royals steal millions from Paddington railway station, two South London gangsters, their killer wives, and the Queen Mother all become involved. Culminating in a final and brutal showdown on the island of Majorca.

The book is online with Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Nook Press.
The screenplay and book are both based in London and Majorca in 1966.
This is a fast paced, action packed adventure about the rivalry of two London gangs, the British royal family and a small group of young friends growing up in a dog eat dog South London council estate.
Prince Philip's three illegitimate children Philip, Charles and Anne steal £18.5 million from under the very noses of everyone at Paddington station. They become property tycoons in Spain, but with two South London villains trying to muscle in, the protection they have from the Queen Mother proves invaluable.
Brian is an old school friend of Philip, Charles and Anne. He searches out his old school friends and tells them about his plan that will make the Great Train Robbery look like a child’s piggy bank robbery. 'The Three' are very interested and two weeks later after some planning, they carry out the robbery.
Harry is an overweight South London gangster: (Ray Winstone type) and Bob, his minder: (Vinnie Jones type) have to defend themselves during an armed home invasion. They come out on top and learn from one of the raiders that the incident was all about some Spanish villas that Harry is interested in. Vince, (Jamie Foreman type), a rival gangster is also interested in the same villas.
After the robbery, the two gangsters and their wives, together with Philip, Charles, and Anne, find themselves thrown together in Majorca. Here, the gangsters find out that 'The Three' are multi-millionaires who own the villas they are fighting over.
That night at Vince’s villa, Bob, Harry’s body guard is shot and killed by two of Vince’s men. Bob had been sticking his nose into Vince and Harry’s business affairs and had to go.
The next day, while the gangsters are on a boat, their wives have them blown up and killed. The wives are both younger and fitter than their overweight abusive husbands and with two business empires just sitting there waiting to be taken. They take them.
It is at this exact moment that The Queen Mother turns up in the harbour, on the Royal Yacht Britannia, at the same time that Philip, Charles and Anne are buying a villa from Barbara Windsor. Her husband is Ronnie Knight, another gangster. They all see the explosion from the villa, which is situated on a cliff top.
That same night, the Queen Mother and her entourage attend a loud and noisy party at a local bar in the harbour.
Due to Harry's demise Philip, Charles and Anne are offered Harry’s London nightclub.
A few days later, back in London, they all end up in St James’s Palace, watching the World Cup Finals on the Queen Mother's colour television. England win and after the match a news item comes on explaining that the Richardson gang have all been arrested and could receive 20 to 25 year prison sentences. The Queen Mother gets up, holding a pint of beer, raises the glass in the air, and in a broad Cockney accent, shouts
As the titles roll…

Nana, may we please have just one house without bugs in it?

QM (V.O.)
Of course you can my darling, your wish is my command.

Three men in dark clothing are fitting bugs all around the house. Just before one of the men puts a bug into a lamp, he talks into the bug and then listens for sound through his earpiece.
Testing, testing, are you sitting comfortably?

INT. St James’s Palace - NIGHT.
The Queen Mother is holding a radio receiver and has an earpiece in her ear, she looks up and smiling, winks into the camera.


Submitted: April 26, 2018
Last Updated: June 24, 2018
Times Downloaded: 7
Last Downloaded: May 6, 2020

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Phil Mitchell's picture

The Writer: Phil Mitchell

At the age of 15 Phil started work in Fleet Street. He worked at the front desk of the Daily Express, and within a year he was in the editorial department, then he was put in charge of Holborne books / Beaverbrooke Press. After a submission to "Citizen Smith" The BBC invited him up to the Writers room. But work and family had to come first. Unfortunatley for Phil a 40 year gap between writing and eaning money (surviving in the big world) took place. But now having time on his hands he's back, and with three books (On Amazon) "No Sales" he has turned them into film scripts and is looking around to test them out, and see if any of them are any good. Go to bio
Law Firm: Tweedie & Prideaux, Lincolns Inn Fields, London, WC2A 3BT
Lawyer: Mrs S.A.MITCHELL
Manager: Petar Rnic

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