The Night We Killed James Marsden

The Night We Killed James Marsden – Synopsis Best friends and screenwriting partners, Beth and Taylor have finally landed a meeting with a big production company only to have their hopes dashed. Again. It seems no one will back their screenplay without an actor attached. But not even Beth—a mom with an oversized, overstuffed bag—keeps one of those in her purse. How is anybody supposed to catch a break in this business? Feeling utterly defeated, Beth and Taylor head back to their respective day jobs just in time to have their day go from bad to worse. Taylor just couldn’t take the fascist regime at the public library for one more second and Beth seems to be the Black Widow of television shows. Now they’re both out of work and out of options. Or so it would seem to more rational human beings. Beth has other ideas on how they can finally take their destiny into their own hands and Taylor thinks they’re great. That night, they head out to a local hotspot to track down the leading man of their dreams: James Marsden. They’ve heard he hangs out there and they know if they could just get him to listen to a quick pitch, he’d never be able to turn them down. But James isn’t there and these ladies have a two drink maximum and people (or a Yorkie) that love them to get home to, so it’s time to go. Too bad they hadn’t figured out that nothing would be that easy for them. (please note, we have also adapted this as The Night We Killed Zac Efron, please DM us and we can supply that version if you are interested) Navigating through the dark, narrow, twisted roads of Laurel Canyon, Beth and Taylor are reliving their glory days as amateur Destiny’s Child cover artists when… BAM! Beth’s minivan slams into something. When the minivan stops spinning and the ladies stop screaming, their headlights illuminate a man crumpled in the road. They rush to help him only to discover that their luck has held: it appears that what they struck was none other than James Marsden! With no cell phone service (why doesn’t this place have cell phone service?) they can see only one option. So, they strap him into the back of the minivan and go searching for a hospital. But they’re hopelessly lost and their navigation system won’t stop speaking Spanish. Seriously. Why the hell doesn’t this place have cell phone service? Now they’re in a race against time, their empty stomachs, and the attentions of a well-meaning cop who Beth is terrified to trust. But just when they think they’ve finally got the Hollywood Hills figured out, they discover they’re more lost than ever before, and the only people who want to help them are a clairvoyant homeless man and Georgia, the woman who has actually been stalking James Marsden. Georgia wants James for her own and there’s nothing she won’t do to have him. With a madwoman hot on their tails, they careen down the dark hills, smash through Downtown tourist hot spots, play chicken in the LA river, and barrel roll back out onto the city streets. They’ve never felt less in control of the world around them or more certain that the only thing they can control is how they handle anything life throws at them. When they’re forced out of the minivan and have to tow James Marsden around Weekend at Bernie’s style, their newfound confidence is pushed to it’s limit. Especially when they lose him to a crowd of Lunar New Year’s revelers in Koreatown. With their nemesis somehow tracking their every move, they search desperately for the lost actor only to find him with the most unlikely of heroes: a performance group of Drag Queens. With the help of these fabulous ladies, Beth and Taylor get their precious cargo back to the minivan and back out onto the road. Hopeless, convinced that their time to save James Marsden has run out, Beth decides it’s time to try to head home to Santa Monica, but neither she nor Taylor have any idea how to get there. Spotting a group of young men standing on a corner, they stop for directions, but Beth’s plea is lost in translation. Luckily, Taylor knows all of the words to Despacito. Just as they finally feel like they’re getting somewhere, the well-meaning cop shows up again. And so does Georgia, loaded down with odd concealed weapons, and a very suspicious bottle of little pills. In the ensuing chaos, Georgia is arrested and Beth and Taylor slip away, finally clear on where they want to go and what they have to do. Beth knows she needs to turn herself in, but all she wants to do is get home to say one last goodbye to her children. Taylor insists they take James Marsden inside with them, totally unwilling to lose him again. While Beth tries to explain what’s happened to her irate husband, and Taylor gets distracted by the doctor next door, Beth’s children discover the very much alive Fred O’Hare (aka James Marsden) is an awful lot of fun as a jungle gym. Insanely relieved, Beth and Taylor finally get the obviously roofied but otherwise unharmed James the medical attention he needs (thank you, doctor next door), and tuck him into bed for what’s left of the night. The next morning, everyone is far more clear-headed, and Beth and Taylor fill James in on the incredible adventure he had with them the night before. Grateful to be out of the clutches of Georgia, he sticks around for breakfast and to finally hear Beth and Taylor’s movie pitch. He loves it as much as they knew he would, and Beth and Taylor finally make it in this crazy town.