Survival First Inc - Apocalypse 101 for the Enlightened Crowd | Script Revolution

Survival First Inc - Apocalypse 101 for the Enlightened Crowd

SURVIVAL FIRST INC.
As the world edges closer to social collapse, two security professionals market a post-apocalyptic protection service for concerned liberals.

The bastards have finally done it: a full-blown apocalypse has hit. The world outside your front door is falling apart.  Even worse, you've no idea how to cling to that precious lifestyle you've crafted for yourself. What on earth can a social justice warrior do to adapt?

You pay attention to this life saving infomercial, to start.

Anyone who knows Steve Mile’s work is aware of this writer’s depth.  He’s written everything from poignant dramas to tense horrors – and now, a humorous short with satirical bite. Written with polished style and finesse, Survival guides us through an unhinged society where self-absorption blends with infomercial inanity, and chaos in hysterical amounts!

Our tale of woe begins in the warm comfort of a family house: one oddly gripped by stone cold fear. It’s happened. The apocalypse has arrived: forcing the family to focus on survival – everything they’ve lived for’s at stake. 

Risking his own life, Dad heads out to find supplies. Tragically, he returns empty handed.  All seems lost. It’s the end of the line.

Except for the timely arrival of Survival First, Inc.! Enter Vic and Ricky - two men who will not only fight to keep you fed, but will allow you to hold onto what really counts: your family’s lifestyle, of course!

Whether you’re a personal blogger or a vegan, these two men are here to sell you a survival plan you can't ignore. Afraid of pesky looters bringing down the value of property in your neighborhood?  Then hire these entrepreneurs. They’ll help you chase off the undesirables, and leave your values pure!

INT. RAY & MAY’S HOUSE - LOUNGE - DAY
Schmaltzy MUSIC plays, soothing…

Cross-legged on beanbags are MAY and RAY, both mid 20s, tanned, manicured specimens of suburban bliss. They face the camera, smiling.

SUPER: MAY, 27, WELL-BEING COACH & BLOGGER

MAY
As a professional life coach and vegan,
I don’t believe in using aggression to assert myself.

SUPER: RAY, 27, CONSULTANT & PROFESSIONAL SLACK-LINER.

RAY
I once set free a whole box of Gummi Bears.
(shrugs)
I’m an I.N.F.P.

MAY
With so much negative energy in the world,
we just knew we had to have a plan. 

It's an unavoidable fact of life: lifestyles sometimes leave a person soft, vapid and vulnerable. But fortunately Vic and Ricky are here to help!  Can’t fend for yourself?  No problem!  Those who have saved up enough in their IRA can afford to have others fend on their behalf.

In just seven pages, Steve Miles paints a hilarious – and bizarrely accurate - picture of society on the brink of collapse.  Sure, demons, zombies or nuclear devastation may be knocking down your door – but that doesn’t mean your priorities must change!

If you’re a reader who relishes comedy with satirical bite, download this script, turn on your Espresso machine (flavored with almond milk) and let Vic and Ricky do the rest.

Survival First Inc can handle whatever the end of the world throws your way - not to mention festivals around the (plague infested) world, too!

 

 

The Script

Survival First Inc.

As the world edges closer to social collapse, two security professionals market a post-apocalyptic protection service for concerned liberals.

About The Reviewer

Cam Gray's picture
Real name: 

Surreal comedies are my release, but everyone else seems to like my dramas so I've put them up here for the sensible readers...

Recently graduated from the London Film School and I'm now attempting to get some of these wonderful pieces of work out there into the real world. If...Read more

About The Writer

Steve Miles's picture
Real name: 

Started writing scripts around five years ago after realising his social life was vastly overrated. Enjoys writing in a variety of genres but leans toward raw, grittier characters and the worlds they inhabit - from the deadly serious to the darkly comic. Drinks coffee, owns an unhealthy amount...Read more