Drunken Noodles - Pilot

Evie Muller is a bubbly, blonde housewife in her early fifties, living in a beautiful home with her second husband, John. John is quite the multi-tasker. He hustles investors, plays the ponies, and texts his mistress - all from the comfort of his home office. Evie is none the wiser. For now, her life is just a bowl of cherries. The only thing Evie loves more than trying new recipes or hosting parties is doting on her children from a previous marriage, Susan and Roy. Twenty-year-old Roy is an aimless jock who divides his time between the gym and his Playstation. His needy, older sister, Susan, is a proud stay-at-home mom, though that home is usually Evie’s. Evie hosts a first-year birthday party for her grandson. The gourmet platters keep coming, much to her guests' delight. Her pushy best friend, Rachel, gushes she should become a professional chef. Evie scoffs at the idea. Susan basks in all the attention – capped off by a wedding proposal from her boyfriend, Billy. But Evie misses the big moment taking out the trash. What she doesn't miss is John imploring to his secretary to give him more time to leave his wife. He seals his promise with a lingering kiss. Evie slams the trash bag down and it splits, spews and sputters – just like their marriage. John moves out. Evie finds solace in the kitchen trying new recipes; that is until she receives ominous crank phone calls. She suspects John is the target of harassment for something nefarious he has done. John claims it’s just kids. He’s buoyed by the prospect of a huge return on an investment and tells Evie not to worry about anything. She thrusts a chocolate meringue torte into his smug face. Friend Rachel visits one morning for coffee and biscotti and brings in the daily newspaper. Front-page news is a devastating explosion at the plant of John’s supposedly lucrative prospect. Evie’s phone pings. It’s her bank. Her savings account has been wiped clean. A real estate agent suddenly appears and parades a potential client through the house. Evie spots a tow-truck hauling her Volvo away! Enraged, Evie races after the tow-truck in Rachel’s Beemer. The real estate agent nibbles on Evie’s delectable biscotti… and sighs. With no savings or home, Evie and Roy move into the tiny apartment of Susan, Billy, and their son. Susan welcomes her mother with open arms, but Billy, not so much. He has had to find room for Evie’s furniture and kitchenware, share the remote with Roy, and suffer his future mother-in-law's fancy, foreign cooking. Mornings they squeeze shoulder-to-shoulder around the kitchen table: Evie spoon feeds her grandson, Susan flips through a wedding magazine, Roy devours breakfast (made by Mom) and Billy glowers at Evie as he slurps his coffee. Evie feels like she’s hit rock bottom. She confides in Rachel that she is going to pull herself out of this mess. She will follow her passion. She will become a professional chef. Rachel is so proud of her. She arranges for Evie to serve at her boss’s fancy party when the chef must leave early. However, Evie mingles with the guests as if she is one. She adds seasoning to the seemingly bland main dish, only to have the sensitive VIP guests belching and farting. She argues with the host over disciplining his son. The host throws Evie out of the house. She complains to Rachel that her boss has no taste, no ethics, no feelings. To which Rachel replies with advice that will resonate throughout the series, “You’re their server, Evie, not their saviour.” Evie stands across the street from her old home and watches wistfully as a young family pulls into the driveway. The real estate agent who sold it bumps into her. The agent offers to hire Evie to prepare nibbles (like that delicious biscotti) for her sales meetings. Evie gratefully accepts. Evie returns to Susan's apartment energized. It’s a small gig, but she plans to impress. Two police officers await. John has gone missing. Initially, Evie responds to the news of John’s disappearance with relief (to the surprise of the officers); but that relief quickly turns to rage. It’s bad enough he squandered her savings on a lemon stock and sold the house from under her. Now she can’t nail him down for alimony! Evie sends the coppers on their way. She’s got biscotti to make.