I never understood the whole “take your dog shopping with you” thing. Especially since most stores and restaurants don’t allow pets inside. (What’s wrong with places like that, anyway? The presence of dogs makes everything better, you ask me.)
“Hey, Sparky, let me take you from the comfy air conditioned house and lock you inside the sweltering Ford death box. That way, you can watch me eat a foot long tuna sub through the window at Subway. Doesn’t that sound like lotsa fun?”
In fact, whenever I see a dog alone in a parked car, I prefer to imagine he had an argument with his owner, stole the keys, and drove himself there. Maybe he gnawed on a bone until it calmed him down, then drove back home to wag his tail and apologize.
Highly doubtful, I realize, but it makes me feel better than the alternative.
By now, you’re probably wondering how this all ties in with the new short script Dog Years, by super scribe Anthony Cawood.
It does. Trust me. Because maybe there are MORE explanations for such things than meets the eye.
Pascal and Antoine are two security guards at the Hadron Collider, who stumble upon a dog locked inside a car. Pascal thinks it’s weird the car’s been there all day, but Antoine dismisses it as “just someone’s pet.”
Pascal just might let it go at that, if it weren’t for “the sign.” Attached to the dog’s collar, it actually reads FROM THE FUTURE. Explain that one, smart guy.
Still, Antoine blows it off as a practical joke. Or maybe it’s one of those hidden camera reality shows. Still – ultimately – it’s just a dog.
So a defeated Pascal mopes back to the guard’s station.
I won’t expose the ending, but what happens next is a bit – extreme.
A fun quirky script, Dog Years will make you chuckle (and think twice) the next time you see a poodle sitting behind the wheel of that rusty mini van in the Walmart parking lot.
Comedy directors – especially those with a fondness of dogs (and security guards) – should scoot across the lawn, and lap this script up. Quickly!
Pages: 4
Budget: Low. A small cast of only three, and one of them will literally work for kibble. As for the Hadron Collider? Stock footage can be subbed in. Or just another sign!