The Tortoise

After gambling away his last $20 in a game of street craps, a homeless man known as THE LAGGARD (40s) spends his day standing by a 4-way intersection, holding a sign that reads, "$20 to punch me in the face." After taking $140-worth of hits to the face, he is befriended by a YUPPIE IN A RED BLAZER (late 20s) who offers him $1,000 for his gold tooth. The Laggard reluctantly agrees and allows the Red Yuppie to pull out his gold tooth with a pair of plyers in a gas station bathroom. The Laggard is furious when he is paid with two $500 chips for a casino called The Tortoise. The Red Yuppie then promptly beats up and mugs the Laggard, taking his phone, wallet, and shoes, leaving him only with the two casino chips. Left with no other option, the Laggard decides to travel 30 miles along the side of I-70 to cash the chips in at the casino. Flashbacks reveal how the Laggard used to frequent The Tortoise casino, despite living paycheck to paycheck. One day, after blowing his paycheck in one afternoon, the Laggard is evicted from his apartment. The Laggard slowly but surely trudges along the side of the highway. His first obstacle arrives in the form of the Rocheport Bridge, a mile-long bridge over the Missouri River, which has no pedestrian crosswalk. The Laggard is forced to walk along the narrow shoulder of the bridge. As he makes his way across, he accidentally slips and ends up dangling over the edge of the bridge. Luckily, he is able to pull himself back up and make it across he bridge unscathed. As the night wears on, the Laggard is eventually picked up by a good Samaritan known as THE DRIVER (40s), who offers to give him a ride. The Laggard accepts his offer, but soon regrets his decision when the Driver pulls a gun on him. In a desperate effort to escape the car, the Laggard tries to wrestle the gun away from the Driver. This leads to the car swerving off the road and crashing in a ditch. The Laggard escapes relatively unharmed, but the Driver is killed in the crash. Determined to make it to the casino, the Laggard takes the Driver's wallet and leaves the scene of the accident. The Laggard makes it to the Super Mart next to the casino, where he uses the Driver's wallet to buy a new outfit. From there, the Laggard proceeds to The Tortoise casino, where he discovers the Red Yuppie and his other YUPPIE FRIENDS (20s) waiting for him. The Yuppies reveal they had each given a homeless person $1,000 in chips and were bidding to see who would make it to the casino first. Since the Laggard showed up first, the Red Yuppie wins $10,000 from each of the other Yuppies. Undeterred by this revelation, the Laggard proceeds to the casino floor where he successfully cashes in his chips. However, he is soon lured to the craps table in the center of the casino floor. The short ends with the Laggard approaching the craps area as he watches a pair of dice glide along the table.